"The free uniting of two people"

When 2009 began, I never expected to become an accidental activist for gay marriage, but now I am a devoted advocate. I'm looking forward to the challenges of 2010 with great hopes toward the inevitability of gay marriage nationwide.
As we follow the pathway to the goal of civil rights for same-sex marriage, we have to look at the gains--and setbacks--of this decade.
When Gavin Newsom, San Francisco's mayor, approved same-sex marriage in February, 2004, nearly 3,200 same-sex couples wed within 10 days. But that didn't last, and the marriages were voided.
Then, four years later on June 16, 2008, the California supreme court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage. Finally! But that didn't last, though the marriages remain valid. Behind the scenes the religious zealots garnered enough signatures--and money--to put a constitutional amendment on the upcoming ballot--and on November 5, 2008, Proposition 8 destroyed same-sex marriage in California once again.
Newsom said the issue "is about civil marriages, not about religious marriages. ... We're not telling religious institutions what to do." Back to square one.
Now, on to Massachusetts. They became the first state to approve gay marriage in 2004, and now five years later, more than 11,000 gay and lesbian couples have married in the state.
Connecticut, Vermont and even Iowa approved gay marriage. Same-sex marriages will begin in New Hampshire in January, 2010, and should begin in Washington, D.C. in the next few months (unless some underhanded scheme evolves).
On the world stage, only seven countries allow gay marriage: Canada, Spain South Africa, Sweden, Norway, the Netherlands and Belgium. Gordon Brown, Britain's prime minister wants British civil partnerships to be recognized across the EU--including Eastern Europe.
On December 21, 2009, Mexico City's assembly cheered in a bill 39-20 to approve same-sex marriage, which includes allowing adoption. Supporters yelled, "Yes we could! Yes we could!" Mexico City's civil code is now calling marriage "the free uniting of two people." How great is that!
This week in Buenos Aires, Argentina, two gay men, who had previously been denied to marry there, were joined in an informal ceremony in the capital of Argentina's Tierra del Fuego province.
Progress has been made and attitudes are changing. As an ordinary mom of two gay children who became an accidental activist this year, I hope that more mothers, parents, gays, straights--anyone with the desire to see the rights of same-sex marriage become acknowledged and approved--join in and represent a sound humanitarian voice for a long-awaited change and make gay marriage a well-deserved civil right--"the free uniting of two people."

In a word

What's in the word "gay?" Does that word have negative power over parents? It shouldn't.
That's why we have to be more vocal and not let the word "gay" overpower us and force us to stand aside silently on the issue of civil rights for our children. We have to verbalize our feelings and let the word "gay" be powerful for us.
In one of those long list of inspirational quotes you see as each new year approaches, I read one that applies to and inspires our cause for civil and marital rights for gays.
"It is not a question as to who is right, but what is right."

A good "old-fashioned" Christmas song

Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Make the yule-tide "gay"

From now on our troubles will be miles away.

Through the years

We all will be together

If the "fates" allow

So, have yourself a merry little Christmas now.

Another step toward our common goal

On Tues., Dec. 15, the District of Columbia's City Council voted to legalize gay marriage in the nation's capital. D.C.'s mayor signed the bill today! Congress does have a final say on laws passed in Washington, D.C., but we hope there is no problem looming and this civil right will be granted at last. If all goes well, same sex marriage will be in effect in the nation's capital by March, 2010.

A good week for gays in politics

This week, the California Assembly unanimously picked its first openly gay speaker. Congratulations to John Perez, who will now hold one of the most powerful positions in state government.
On Saturday, December 12, Annise Parker, 53, was elected Houston's first openly gay mayor. Houston is the fourth-largest city in the country with a population of 2.2 million. Of that population, it is estimated that 60,000 identify themselves as gay or lesbian. Congraulations to the new mayor who received 53.6 percent of the vote.

"Rocket Man" rejected

In September, when Elton John met Lev, a 14-month old boy in a Ukrainian home for HIV-positive children, he made plans to adopt the child.
As it turned out, the adoption was rejected because the musician was said to be too old and not married--even though in the UK his civil union with David Furnish is considered marriage.
Is it because he is gay?
What if Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt showed up to adopt a Ukrainian child? What would happen? They're not married. I'm guessing they would be approved.
According to Furnish, Elton John was devastated by the rejection. But because Sir Elton John is the real deal and truly committed to the well-being of Lev, he put aside the obvious discrimination and intends to support Lev and his brother and assure them the best health care, education and family options possible!
As far as I'm concerned, "I think it's going to be a long long time" before Elton John gives any of those Ukrainian naysayers an autograph or concert tickets, but Lev and his brother will enjoy front row seats and a good life because of Elton John.

New York State Sen. Savino--a strong voice for marital equality

Sen. Savino says it all in her eloquent speech prior to the failed vote which would have made gay marriage a civil right in New York. This unfortunate loss will only give proponents of gay marriage across the country even more determination. The voice of mothers is clearly necessary.
Watch and listen to Sen. Savino. I don't think she's going to sit back and take this defeat lightly.

Senator Savino speaks on Marriage Equality

Bible-based bigotry shuts the book on New York's gay marriage bill--for now

Of all places--New York! I thought their lawmakers were more sophisticated and open minded. I was stunned that the gay marriage bill had failed. According to the Associated Press, Gov. David Patterson, described the defeat as one of the saddest days in his 20 years of public service. He claimed senators who actually supported the bill "didn't have the intestinal fortitude to vote for it."
"I wasn't expecting betrayal," said an angry and disappointed Sen. Thomas Duane, the openly gay Manhattan Democrat who sponsored the bill.
Sen. Eric Adams, a Democrat from Brooklyn asked the group to set aside their religious beliefs and vote for the bill. "When I walk through these doors, my Bible stays out," he said.
Enter the bible thumpers--led by Sen. Ruben Diaz, a Republican and a conservative minister from the Bronx, who stated, "You should carry your Bible all the time."
In spite of supporters with personal interest in the measure and comparisons to racism and the holocaust, the bill failed to pass by 8 votes--a huge letdown for the gay community and supporters of gay marriage. We were counting on New York!
The only thing that made me feel better was remembering what happened on a street corner near Syracuse University campus a few weeks earlier. A woman dressed in an ankle-length corduroy skirt stood holding a sign that read "Homosexuality is sin. Christ can set you free!" When a student saw her hateful sign he got an idea that would hopefully make her feel as uncomfortable as she had made him feel. A few minutes later, he was back standing beside her with a big sign that read "Corduroy skirts are a sin." (The photos are all over the internet. Just google corduroy skirts are a sin to see the photos and read the dialogue.) That puts it into perspective for me. We need a social movement like "Mothers for Gay Marriage--nothing political, governmental or religious--in order for same-sex marriage to be approved!